Sunday 16 June 2013

PEOPLE WHO CAN'T STOP TALKING : GIVE THE OTHER PERSON A CHANCE TO SPEAK AS WELL


I was travelling by U.S. Airways from Charleston to Detroit last month, the journey was around 1.5 hours. My husband and I were tired after the flight from the long journey from Kuwait to Frankfurt and Frankfurt to Charleston. I couldn't wait to get to my son's place in Lake Orion, Michigan. We sat in our seats, the flight took off, and I could hear loud one sided conversation. I look towards my left, in the next row was sitting an older man and a young man. The older man kept talking incessantly. It was loud enough for everyone around to hear. I looked away into the clouds visible from my window. An hour passed and he was talking without a pause. I couldn't help looking in that direction time and again. The young man next to him looked so uncomfortable, bored, kept shifting and wriggling in his seat, he became red in the face (may be was furious but didn't voice it) and his body language indicated to silently shout, ' Stop talking, I can't take it anymore'. I honestly don't know how the young man was so tolerant and civil enough to bear it for 1.5 hours and was never given an opportunity to participate in the conversation at any point of time.  May be the young man should have yawned and pretended to dose off which would have made the other man stop talking. It would have been such a relief to rest of the passengers. 

Have you come across people like that, who like to have one sided conversation without giving a chance to the other person to speak?. And when you try to speak, they cut you off, and throw at you another long story. How do you react or respond, or do you keep quiet and keep listening till he decides to stop. Or are you clever and give an acceptable excuse and free yourself from the predicament.  If you are a gifted conversationalist, you can politely interrupt, and talk about interesting things. Who knows, the other person might totally enjoy that. 

People who think, it's all about them, and love the sound of their own voice, should pause to allow the other person to share his thoughts and experiences as well. When you are travelling or at a party, or with friends,  it's honestly rude to just go on talking and not ask questions or listen to what  others might have to share. You can't keep talking non-stop and expect the others to be enjoying a one sided conversation unless you are speaking at a seminar or conference and you are a good orator with skills of captivating an audience. Even at seminars, workshops and conferences, the sessions are interactive where the audience get to participate!  

Sometimes, people speak endlessly about something they are passionate about without any actual intention of seeming a non stop talker. It's importance to be perceptive of people's body language and signs they give out so you know if the topic you are discussing is boring, baffling, irritating, or even uninteresting or if you've spoken enough. Remember, people like it when they are given a chance to express and share their thoughts as well, just as much as you like to share yours. It shows you care and you are respectful towards them. 

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